Le meilleur d'Omegle !

[Eloyce]

Morceaux choisis, avec le même étranger:

You: HELLO WORLD
Stranger: hey bitch whats your ASL?
You: 99 robot robotland
You: you,
Stranger: 123 Alberto Albanny
You: 123? wow
You: that's pretty old
Stranger: yeah bitch but I feel 16
You: aha what's your secret?
Stranger: potatoes
Stranger: and beer
Stranger: lots
You: oh, that's pretty much my daily routine
Stranger: yeah right copycat
You: i hope i'm gonna live as long as you
Stranger: yer a robot you will of course outlive me
You: that's right
Stranger: yeah duh
Stranger: I thought robots were smart
You: i am!
You: we are!
Stranger: Yeah...
Stranger: what do you mean "we"?
You: us, robots
Stranger: last guy who said that ended up in a pine box
You: aha
Stranger: A PINE BOX!!!!
Stranger: welcome to Macintosh bitch!
Stranger: today is my birthday
Stranger: and your time to die!!!!!
Stranger: evil robot
You: oh happy birthday then
You: no i'm not dying
You: you will
Stranger: noooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: My heart!
Stranger: My 123 year old heart!

--

Stranger: want to take a ride in my shaggin wagon?
Stranger: we could take a trip to the moon
You: sure!
You: it might be fun
Stranger: then we could jump in the mystery machine and solve neighborhood mysteries!
Stranger: with a dog named scoob
You: oh yeah, i'm sure we aren't alone in the universe though
Stranger: then we could see Led Zeppelin live
You: on the moon!
Stranger: we just have to believe baby!
You: in led zeppelin we trust
Stranger: indeed
Stranger: then after that I dont know what to do
You: mh maybe we could travel the world
You: and claim that there are strange little green dudes on another planet
Stranger: yeah but then what?
Stranger: maybe we could pick up some chicks?
You: only if I can take some dudes with me! i'm not a guy, i'm not that keen on chicks you know
Stranger: Oh yeah
Stranger: the shaggin wagon is on the road baby!
Stranger: 70's night here we come!
You: yeaah we are going back in time!
You: just like marty mc fly

--

Stranger: Im scared
You: stop being scared!
Stranger: I cant help it!
You: i'm not gonna eat you, i'm a vegetarian anyway..
Stranger: Oh thats attractive
You: really?
Stranger: yeah!
You: why?
Stranger: I dont know
You:
You: vegetables turn you on or something?
Stranger: no
You: so why is it attractive?
Stranger: I dont know
Stranger: sounds hot

 

[Haruhi]

--

Stranger: Im scared
You: stop being scared!
Stranger: I cant help it!
You: i'm not gonna eat you, i'm a vegetarian anyway..
Stranger: Oh thats attractive
You: really?
Stranger: yeah!
You: why?
Stranger: I dont know
You:
You: vegetables turn you on or something?
Stranger: no
You: so why is it attractive?
Stranger: I dont know
Stranger: sounds hot

Je ne savais pas que le fait d'être végétarienne me rendait plus sexy =P

 

[Mike]

You: hi there
Stranger: hey\
You: what time is it ?
Stranger: time for you to hop on my dick
You: I think mine is bigger than urs
Stranger: I CHALLENGE YOU
Stranger: TO A SWORD FIGHt
Stranger: on my side
Stranger: we have
Stranger: VLAD THE IMPALER
You: yeah ... right.
Stranger: on your side
Stranger: squirmin herman
Stranger: the one eyed german
Stranger: fail
Stranger: seeya

Juste: mon fou rire du soir.

You: hi there
Stranger: Hi! m or f ????
You: both
Stranger: ha ha ha. no seriously?
You: I am serious
You: I'm an hermaphrodite
Stranger: ok without me. sorry for you i'm a 17 years old blond hot lokkin for a guy with big cock. but you're kinda funny for it.
Stranger: bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

haha.

 

[Coralie's-Heart]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Hey =)

Stranger: hello

Stranger: female?

Stranger: male?

You: Middle

You: you ?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Pas très tolerant le type x)

 

[Hippie.]

Stranger: hi

You: Bonjour

Stranger: m or f

You: f

Stranger: frrom

You: france

Stranger: r u a good kisser

You: of course i am, im french

You: we invented kiss

Stranger: would u teach me if i wus with u

You: we learn kissing at school

You: were not allowed to teach it unless we are phD

Stranger: could u show me some moves

You: no need, we now have youtube

Stranger: but i want to learn with a cute french girl

You: well im not cute i have a beard

You: although my beard is cute
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Boarf, mon anglais est ridicule.
---
Stranger: hi

Stranger: 18 m usa

Stranger: u

You: 60 f france

Stranger: nice

Stranger: do u have msn and cam?

You: what is a cam

You: what is a computer

Stranger: web cam

Stranger: fuck u

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[Leorocking]

Stranger: asl?
Stranger:
You: Beyonce knowles
You: 28
You: female
Stranger: tell me more
You: i'm a singer
Stranger: yeah..?
Stranger: lol
You:
You: You want a song ?^^
You: BABY I CAN FEEL YOUR HALOO
You: I GOT MY ANGEL NOW
Stranger: OMG
Stranger: MY EARS
You: I CAN FEEL YOUR HALO
You: HALO
Stranger: ARE BURNING
You: HAAALO
Stranger: OMG
You: HAAAALLLOOO
Stranger: UR VOICE IS TERRIBLE
You: YOUR HALLOO HAALLOO HAAALOO
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[AnonymousUser]

Stranger: hi

You: Bonjour

Stranger: how r u?

You: ça va et toi ?

Stranger: i understand french but could u speack in english please

You: I don't speak very well english

You: but i can hope !

Stranger: male or female

You: female and u ?

Stranger: male

Stranger: how old are u?

You: I'm 16 and u ?

Stranger: 18

Stranger: hey if i show u a picture of my girlfriend could u give me some advice on her?

You: Ow if you want yes

Stranger: thanks

Stranger: Image - TinyPic - Free Image Hosting, Photo Sharing & Video Hosting

Stranger: this is her

You: She is pretty

Stranger: thank u

Stranger: this is akward but from looking at her what do u think would be her best sex position?

You: La sodomie tu devrais essayer c'est pas mal je trouve !

Stranger: what?

You: Désolé Roger mon sex friend de 57 ans arrive chez moi !


Il est parti aprés

 

[AnonymousUser]

Celui-ci avait l'air tellement content sue je sois une fille que je n'ai pas pu m'empecher de lui faire croire que les hommes ne m'interessait pas^^

Stranger: hey babe

You: hi

Stranger: you a girl?

You: yes

Stranger: sweeeet

You: you're not a girl?

Stranger: nope

You:

Stranger: you dont like guys?

You: i prefer girls..

Stranger: :o thats HOT

You: goodbye

 

[AnonymousUser]

Il est deux heures du matin et je viens de parler avec une fille sur Omegle qui a pratiquement les mêmes origines que moi, vit dans mon département, est dans ma fac, suit le même cursus et est dans le même amphi. Ahah. En gros, je l'ai cotoyée pendant deux ans sans le savoir. Si c'est pas le destin ça. Du coup, on se voit Lundi \o/

 

[Hippie.]

Bon j'ai tenté deux nouvelles approches : "Where the fuck have you been ??" et "Why did you do that ?!". Y'en a beaucoup qui me répondent "?" ou "Do what ?" mais je suis tombé sur une qui était énorme, je vous mets des extraits qui m'ont fait trop rire grâce à leur puissance de hors-sujet :

You: why did you do that

Stranger: I'm sorry

Stranger: The angry unicorns made me do it!

You: no way

Stranger: They told me to. Or they'd steal my cookie.

You: the marshmallow cookie ?

Stranger: Yes that one!

You: no way !!!


You: these bitches are crazy

You: they are lactose intolerant

You: they cant eat these cookies

Stranger: Well they'd steal it and rape it. I don't want my cookie raped
---
You: lets go

You: ill call my elephant

Stranger: They ran off to candy mountain

You: well lets go lets go now

Stranger: No. The walrus will be better

You: we shouldnt wait

You: which one ? green or blue one ?

Stranger: We need our scuba suits first!
Stranger: I have extra. Just cut that mountain goat in half. You'll see it.
Stranger: Well get dressed!

Stranger: I don't have all day. I want that cookie back. It's my dogs birthday. I need to be home
--
You: now that we're on the road which way should we take

You: the jello sea

You: is the best i think

You: unless you still have this strawberry fear of yours

Stranger: Left. Giant toads are to the right this time of day

You: you're right

Stranger: No. Just oranges

You: good

Stranger: Wait!! Is the jello more than seven feet deep?

You: hum... im afraid it is

Stranger: Then take your hat first.
--
You: WAIT !


You: did you hear that ?


Stranger: I farted. Sorry
--
Stranger: This is not candy mountain.

You: what ???

Stranger: You took the wrong turn on nakedbarbie ave.

--


You: ok i have an idea
You: lets teleport

Stranger: Well good, the walrus is dead

You: yeah, once they come, they usually die

Stranger: Stand on your left elbow so we can teleport

You: yeah

You: gimme your feet

You: thanks

Stranger: Ok good. Were here

Stranger: Wait. Damn it, my pants didn't teleport.

A chaque fois que je trouve des gens cool je viens voir ici pour savoir si c'était pas une mad hinhin.

 

[Machaw]

Stranger: hello stranger

You: salut beauté

Stranger: guten tag

Stranger: parle-vous francais?

You: yeah i'm french

(...)
Stranger: what does this mean: je sius une soillou. te prond moi. ?

Stranger: coz i think it means 'i am a slut. take me now.' lol my friends tried to teach it to me....but they only learnt french a little at school

You: huum there is a lot of mistakes

Stranger: lol i thought so

Stranger: how would u say it?

Stranger: take me now, as in like that really dramatic TAKEEE MEEEE! kinda thing like in the old movies haha

You: it's ' je suis une salope, prends moi'

Stranger: ohhh iv always been told that soillou is slut. i dont think im spelling it right....but its said like 'swu-loo'

You: humm no i don't know this word

You: oooh maybe 'salaud'

You: but thats for men

Stranger: oh ok ahwell. all those times i called my friends sluts in french....haha wat a waste

Stranger: haha like man whore?

Stranger: we dont really have a word for it

Stranger: what would be the word for 'now'?

You: maintenant

Stranger: ok so i could say je suis une salope, prends moi maintenant

You: thats right

You: useful sentence !

(...)Stranger: je suis framage

Stranger: voule vouco che avec moi sessois! mocha choca latte yaya. creola lady marmalaaaade

ahaha



Et par rapport aux français :

Stranger: French ey?
You: yes i am
Stranger: does that make you one of those croissant eating buggers then ey?
Stranger: hey... what's a snail like?
Stranger: i've seen them in the garden but they're always dry and crispy..
Stranger: Heard they're better juicy

 

[Brancowitz.]

Stranger: Hi
You: Hey stranger
Stranger: Asl ?
You: First, what are you looking for ?
Stranger:a conversation
Stranger: just a talk and MAYBE more if affinities.
You : More like what ?
You : Eating ice cream on sunday afternoon ?
Your conversational partner has disconnected